(Now, if you're lactose-intolerant, this may not be the game for you...)
Grab some eggnog (with a little extra "kick", if that's your pleasure) and take a swig for each time you've done the following this holiday season:
- made direct eye-contact/shared a smile with a Santa (this includes the mall variety as well as bearded guys on the street wearing Santa hats)
- got a little excited when you saw the blue flannel-sleeved arm of the guy who turns the logs on the "Holiday Fireplace" channel on TV
- performed a random act of kindness and didn't tell anyone about it
- were lucky enough to be in the presence of a child who still believes in Santa Claus
- have a friend or relative named Noel/Noelle
- caught snowflakes with your tongue
- made a snow angel
- are wearing Christmas socks right now
- have reached a point in your life where giving gifts is just as good, if not better than, receiving them
- have worn/are wearing one (or all) of the following: fake reindeer antlers, a Santa hat, bells
- secretly shook one of your Christmas presents like an 8 year old
- have put any of the following on a household pet and taken a picture of it: fake reindeer antlers, Santa hat, harness-with-bells, tinsel
- have sincerely apologized to said pet for the aforementioned photo shoot
- secretly think the people in the really nice neighbourhoods who didn't put lights up, suck..(just a little)
- wish that "peace on earth" included no mention of: Tiger Woods, the Gosselins, or Brangelina again, until, like, March
- are secretly jealous of your Jewish friends, because they get gifts, like, every freakin' day during Hanukkah
- have gone/are going to see a movie on Christmas Day (Sherlock Holmes - woot, woot!)
- feel just a little more Christmas-y (..and/or drunk) after reading this
Happy Holidays, Loved Ones.
(For Jane..)
Reminiscing between my 11 year old and 3 year old nieces: "Remember when Daddy got those crabs..?"
My mom's familiarity with major social networks:
"Are you on My Face?"
My sister and I discussing the recent increase in gang activity where she lives:
Me: "What is up with Langley and Abbotsford?"
Z: " Nickelback moved here."
My 3 year old niece assessing my T-shirt:
I: "You didn't make that shirt, did you?"
Me: "No. Why..do you like it?"
I: "Yeah."
Me: "Uhh, me too..?"
(..And after perusing her mother's bedroom, asked if my sister had "made" the carpet.)
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As penance for not writing for so long, I will now own up to five personal facts which range in varying degrees of mortification...
1) I used to think euthanasia was actually "Youth In Asia", which I took to be some young dance troupe from the far east, and could not understand why they were so controversial/constantly in the news.
2) I once stated that I had extensive "customer cervix experience" in a job interview (with a female interviewer, of course).
3) Though it seems to be a mandatory requirement of Canadian citizenship to hate Nickelback, I like approximately four of their songs, including the one playing while I write this.
4) Once while still inebriated at a friend's house, I woke in the middle of the night and unable to find the door to the hall leading to the washroom, tried to open a poster on her wall. When this failed to lead me to urinary salvation, I then proceeded to pee on her carpet and return to bed. In the morning, I remained silent as her dog, Honey, was blamed for the uncharacteristic "accident" (growling, knowing full-well that she had been framed).
...Sorry, H.
5) I recently acquired a little girl-crush on TV's Rachael Ray which I do not care to analyze and am unable to explain.
It's good to be back. ;)